Spoon the last kitchen utensil Blood remake
by diet-courtney
Summary: Well .. I got bored and This fic was the result .. a mix of blood the last vampire, meets kitchen ware .. to teach you to shut your pantrys! more to come ..
1. Kitchen utensils

Spoon .. the last kitchen utensil  
  
*****Starring: saya, david, louis, nurselady, linda, mary, and kitchen friends*****  
  
Saya: You whore =| -bitch slaps louis- YOU LEFT THE F-ING SILVERWEAR DRAWER OPEN AGAIN!!!  
  
Louis: so =S  
  
David: JUST CLOSE IT .. DONT PISS HER OFF SHES THE ONLY ORIGIONAL LEFT!!!  
  
Louis: origional what .. bitch?  
  
Saya: WHAT DID YOU SAY -gets her big long knife thinger out and runs towards louis-  
  
Louis: AHHHHHHHHHHHH -jumps out yokota Air force base's kitchen window-  
  
Saya: COME BACK HERE YOU F*ING VAMP HATER!!!  
  
David: *kenan and kel style* BUT WAIT .. WHAT WILL WE DO!??! awwwwwwwwwww here it goes!!  
  
Booming narrative voice: so the air force base's kitchen was empty and all the lights were off .. but louis had still forgot to close the drawer!  
  
Spoon: -creeps out of the drawer and creeps along the floor with toothpaste hooked to side-  
  
Fork: -grows wings like a vampire and jumps out-  
  
Spoon: -pulls out toothpick and slashes the fork in half magically!!-  
  
Fork: -is all bent and cripled in agony-  
  
Spoon: -walks away calmly-  
  
Linda: -walks into room- OO A SPOON -picks it up- oo .. its got a toothpick o.O ..  
  
Spoon: -silently thinks oh shit .-  
  
Linda: -looks at spoon up close-  
  
Spoon: -stabs her in the nose with toothpick and runs away RUN RUN RUN!!!-  
  
Linda: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY FACE IM GOING TO GET A PORE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH -runs off- ALL I WANTED WAS CEREAL  
  
Spoon: -silently walks along- =| dont piss me off  
  
Butter knife: so spoon, Ive found 4 more of them we've got to work fast .. before they spread  
  
Spoon: I know what to do =|  
  
Butter knife: YOUVE GOT TO LISTEN TO ME .. THEY'LL SPREAD  
  
Spoon: -bitch slaps the butter knife- =| i need to get a new tooth pick 1st .. i stabbed that human girl .. i left it in her face .!!  
  
Butterknife: it will be hard but we can do it ....  
  
Spoon: That was the best toothpick .. the circular ones are best .. keep your eyes out .. im unsafe here now ..  
  
Butterknife: I'll send spatchula .. you'll have a better chance that way  
  
Spoon: fine .. -mummers 'shit' to herself- HOW IN THE HELL IS THAT STUPID SPATCHULA OF A LOUIS IMMITATION GOING TO HELP ME!??! tell me this HOW!?!? -slaps the butterknife and hides under the fridge- quick here comes another one..  
  
fork: -creeps around the corner of the counter-  
  
Spoon: -whispers to butterknife- "hes about to transform and i dont have my toothpick with me .  
  
Butterknife: use me .. im not very sharp .. but i'll work for now  
  
Spoon: work for what..? spreading butter on the fork!?!? well .. w/e  
  
Fork : -transforms into a .. DUM DUM DUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM SPORK!!!!!!!!!!!!-  
  
Spoon: 3 2 1 ATTACKKKKKKK -picks up the butterknife and spins around denting the spork- SHIT =@ ITS NOT WORKING HES METAL!!  
  
Butterknife: - bites the spork-  
  
Spork: -dies- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH -hiss hiss snarl snarl growl gasp die-  
  
Spoon: that was good .. but theres still 2 left .. we've got to get them back  
  
Butterknife: You can use me .. we'll be a great team ..  
  
Spoon: that was vile =| i refuse to use you ever again  
  
Butterknife: fine but I KICKED ARSE  
  
Spoon: YOU STUPID FUNK! YOU DIDNT DO ANYTHING!  
  
Saya: -walks into room accompanied by david- We didnt find him .. Im starting to think hes one of them ..  
  
David: Louis? one of them .. well now that you say so .. he has been acting strangely lately .. always hanging around with those two girls.. linda and mary?  
  
Saya: yea .. theyve been acting suspiciously lately too .. not wanting to go into the sun .. going to the nurse a lot..  
  
David: THATS IT! the nurses office  
  
Saya: LETS GO -runs across the floor and steps on a spork- what the hell!?!?  
  
spoon: (whispering to butterknife .. that only makes one left!)  
  
Saya: IM GOING TO KILL LOUIS WHEN I FIND HIM .. leavin the drawer open like that =|  
  
David: lets just go ..  
  
*****AT THE NURSES OFFICE OUTSIDE THE DOOR*****  
  
Saya: lets go kick their asses!  
  
David: no .. lets just put our ears up against the door.. listen for a while ..  
  
-Louis: OH OH OH YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA -Linda: you like that? eh baby uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh OHHHHHHHH mmmmmmmmmm  
  
-Mary: oo i cant talk with my mouth full like this baby uh oh yyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa uhhhhhhhh -Linda: louis .. harder HARDER LOUIS ohhhhhh yeaaaaaaa thats the way mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm -Louis: Like this baby?  
  
David: mm saya ;) sounds good lets do it  
  
Saya: ha ha very funny .. im still up for kicking all of their asses .. but i dont want to know what theyre doing  
  
David: oo i'd like to do what theyre doing with you from the sound of it ;)  
  
Saya: =| stop making passes at me ... youre old enuff to be my dad ... although im from like the funkin .. 20's!  
  
David: v.v' ok =( ... well ..lets do it!  
  
Saya: I TOLD YOU TO STOP =@  
  
David: i was talking about charging them =S  
  
Saya: oh .. will do -opens up the door and charges into the nurses office to the full fledged ..  
  
To be continued ;) R/R on what you think theyre doing lol =P -skoot 


	2. history

Everyone: *glares up in horror at saya and david*  
  
Saya: what the !?!? o.O  
  
David: oh my!!  
  
Saya: YOU WANTED TO SCRATCH MY BACK AND TO FEED ME CEREAL!?!?  
  
David: errrrr thats not what i was thinking about  
  
Saya: *smacks him* STOP MAKING PASSES YOU STUPID LITTLE MAN!  
  
Mary: *swallows* what are you guys doing here *glares evilly*..  
  
Linda: oh looey honey dont stop Ive got an itchy spot a little further up ^_^  
  
Saya: well well well .. O.o you people disgust me!!!!! AND YOURE A VAMP WANNA BE ARENT YOU .. ARENT YOu!?!?!?!  
  
Linda: *conceals fangs* no *lunges foreward towards Saya to attack her*  
  
Saya: NO *pulls out knife and cuts her in half* but is cut by Lindas razor sharp fangs*  
  
David: NOOO SAYAAAAA  
  
~Room grows dark and scene fades as saya falls unconsious~  
  
Louis: wow she had us all scared for a minute there!  
  
David: yah I know .. Lindas gone now but we're still here she'll probably never know we're vamps too ..  
  
Mary: want to finish her off?  
  
Louis: she's the last origional .. the only thing that could stop us .. if we got rid of her .. now when she is so defenseless we could be unstoppable .. once we reach our maxium state .. we will be..  
  
David: invinsable  
  
All: *evil laugh*  
  
Saya: *shivers and moans in sleepness*  
  
David: *crouches down next to her and strokes her hair* but .. she is so silent .. so small against the dark of the room .. how could we take her .. her being so defenseless .. do you want that on your conscience ??  
  
Mary: Fine I'll do it .. i dont much care *reaches for her knife* she killed my best friend! my best friend in the whole world now she'll pay .. first her then the world .. think of our goals!!  
  
David: No we cant not we must not  
  
Louis: FOR GODS SAKE WHY NOT!!?  
  
David: for you to kill her .. you must kill me *drapes himself over sayas limp body*  
  
Louis: WHAT ARE YOU DOING !? we're so close we could have EVERYTHING *frustrated voice* come on we're partners dont make me have to do this ..  
  
David: have to do what .. kill me .. its okay .. dont take it upon yourself.. we're only best friends .. just kill me .. I love her and nothing will change that you cant make me turn my back on her .. I wont she means too much to me..  
  
Mary: BUT LOOK HOW SHE TREATS YOU ..  
  
David: yes but i love her .. shes really sweet when she wants to be just she doesnt much care for stupiditys ... thats all I mean shes totally different when we're alone .. you dont even know her  
  
Mary: well I dont care .. i dont want to know her she just killed my best friend *points to the half transformed Linda*  
  
Louis: please just get off her! this can be quick and easy if you only let it be!  
  
David: kill me first  
  
Mary: *picks up sayas long knife and tries to stab through him*  
  
Louis: *holds her off screaming* NO DONT NOT NOW NO MARY  
  
Mary: *falls down to the ground crying* I just want Lindas death to be avenged ='(  
  
Saya: *groggy* whats going on .. where am I .. david is that you *looks up at him* why are you on me get off you goat  
  
David: youre alive *cries happiness and takes her in his arms*  
  
Saya: Get offa me!! *pushes him away* .. wheres my knife ... whats going on here  
  
Louis: well you see now david .. you just cant have her .. she might have this nice side you speak of but i really dont see that.. Mary .. give her the knife  
  
Mary: here you go you whore *runs away with her hands covering her face up to the dormitories*  
  
Louis: I better go see if shes okay .. *runs after her*  
  
David: why do you push me away .. ?  
  
Saya: I dont much want to talk about it .. painful  
  
David: its okay just tell me we're close .. I love you ..  
  
Saya: I just dont love you .. youre my commrad .. not my lover .. I have a boyfriend from the 20's but he was killed for my actions .. i just dont think i could love again .. not knowing that its just to painful  
  
David: what do you mean for your actions? what are you talking about ?  
  
Saya: it was a long time ago .. we vampires were persecuted terribly .. people were afraid to go out past dark .. craziness really .. I was with a handsome young guy by the name of yokoshui (yoh-koh-shoe-ee).. we were made for eachother .. we did everything together .. that was before exile ...  
  
David: exile?  
  
Saya: I was always told that I was special .. there were always people around me .. asking me to "free" them .. i never knew what they meant .... the cemetary near my home was vandalized. Adolescents I imagine.. but the angry townspeople came to my house and they screamed for me to come out .. yoko told me to stay in the house but i went to the window in time to see them setting the house on fire.. we rushed downstairs .. and rushed outside .. but in a glimpse of horror I forgot the baby in the next room .. he went to get her but the flames blocked their pathway and they burned .. as for me they banished me like some kind of freak .. it was then that I found my powers.. then I knew I must avenge yoko and seria my only baby girl  
  
David: *moves nearer to her and takes her in his arm as she sobs* its okay hun its okay  
  
Saya: *breaks away tearfully* ITS NOT OKAY they killed seria and yoko .. i will never see them again .. then they sent me here .. into the future i dont know what or how *breaks up*  
  
David: well .. together we will avenge their wrongful deaths .. i promise you that yoko and seria will be justified .. they will  
  
Saya: right =')  
  
~~~Upstairs in the dormitories~~~  
  
Mary: what a slut and that stupid david *screams while sobbing* why cant he see she doesnt love him shes just so heartless and she killed linda I'll never see linda again oh my god oh my god *sobs*  
  
Louis: *holds her close* hun you'll see linda again someday..  
  
Mary: yes .. but not soon enough we had dreams. . dreams we were going to go to prom together and raise children together we had our lives ahead of us  
  
Louis: How about we fulfill those dreams .. you and me?  
  
Mary: you and me? dont make me laugh *sobs* you dont even like me  
  
Louis: but youre all wrong I do like you .. a lot I love you Mary I really do *rests his head over her shoulder*  
  
Mary: really? you like me too *chokes up* louis .. i love you *sobs into his shirt*  
  
Louis: we could get married.. raise children together .. I'll go to the prom with you .. live life with you  
  
Mary: oh Louis!! that sounds wonderful *gasps*  
  
Louis: *gets down on one knee and takes off his own ring presenting it to her* .. i know i dont have too awful much to give but .. perhaps if you would .. though i can not possibly imagine ..all I have to offer is these empty hands ..  
  
Mary: *grabs his hands* not empty anymore!  
  
Louis: *hugs her tight and kisses her cheek*  
  
~~~ to be continued ~~~ 


End file.
